Hashes

1091

Date : 06/09/11
Hare : Keyboard Ken
Scribe : Mr Eager
Venue : The Horns
Hounds : 24     Dogs : 0
Recorded distance : 0.00 km
Recorded time : 0.00 min
Uphillness : 0.00 ft

As I drove down the Marlow bypass, for tonight's Hash, the weather was not looking good. Summer seems to have come to an abrupt end. Arriving at Crazies Hill, I noticed most hashers were going for the multiple layer approach, yes it definitely looks like summer is over. Helen and Jo were in attendance and looked like models about to partake in a shoot for an upmarket outdoor outfitter. Most of the remaining hashers simply looked like cold filmcrew members, keen to get going.

Tracker Ken was tonight's hare and his vague reference to lengths of the runs was met with disbelief from those of us who know that Ken doesn’t set short hashes. Ade put Ken's mind at rest, while scaring the rest of us, by saying he'd told Gilly not to report him missing until Friday! I’m not sure which Friday he meant.

On right was duly called and off we went. The first check was greeted with the turning on of the first torches. A defining moment in the Hashing year, yes summer was officially over.

Mike and Judy's late arrival resulted in the FRBs having a very long on back, which was almost a return run to the horizon. Being a polite hash, the next check was called as a regroup. Ken then called his first incorrect on right. Was he trying to keep us on our toes or did he want to make his run even longer?

Up a hill we went towards Penny's Lane. This part of the world is not often hashed by us and makes an interesting change. The area was lovely and nicely cut off; with the landowners appearing to be rich horse-owning people. Some being so wealthy that they even mow their adjoining nice wide footpaths. Our resident horse expert, Helen, informed the pack that wooden fencing in the corners of the horse tracks was a very good and expensive feature and they were well made. Horses, and more importantly their owners, apparently like them, as they don't allow horses to get trapped. Not only is the Hash good for one's fitness, it also teaches you things which are rarely of any subsequent use.

Despite being well mown, there were unfortunately some nasty ankle traps along these footpaths. This fact caused the FRBs to look out keenly for them and on finding one, proudly stand over it with a torch shouting 'hole!'. I did suggest that being dangerous, single individuals with no commitments should go first. I then heard two hashers trying to outrank one another with a comment of  'you're not married, but I'm engaged'; the reply 'I can't get married, as I'm having a new kitchen' left me perplexed.

The short split came very late in the run and had the pack becoming increasingly aware that we could be on for a very long run. Ken informed the pack just before we split that a lovely view was on offer around the bend in the road. While trying to see if I could make out Ade's house, I noticed I had been left with the shorts. Was the hare trying to lose the scribe?

Later we regrouped by the side of a small road. Hawkeye then proceeded to run after a passing cyclist and failed to see the following female cyclist. So confused were they by the brightness of his torch and his antics that we witnessed them cycling around in a circle later in the evening.

As we ran passed the 'On-Inn' a lovely looking pub greeted up together with a great smell of chips. We were not to be disappointed, with many believing the chips on offer were the best to date.

Roger called us to order to announce that Mr Barney was entitled to yet another t-shirt, having now completed 850 runs. Having looked at how far we ran tonight and using various assumptions that accountants always use, that is the equivalent of 42 of Ken's Hashes.

Congratulation Barney on 850 runs and congratulations to Ken for setting a great hash.