Hashes

1612

Date : 21/12/21
Scribe :
Venue : The Falcon
Hounds : dunno     Dogs : 0
Recorded distance : 7.65 km
Recorded time : 81.77 min
Uphillness : 121.59 ft

It was a cold and clear night for the hibernal solstice which also, by chance, co-incided with 'traditional' Christmas Carol HASH. And so the Hashers gathered in the East (of Wycombe)  where there was an inn, which promised to have room, at least for beverages. 

For tonight's hash we were to be blessed with two Hares and one choir mistress, fully prepared with handy laminated song sheets. Unfortunately laminated song sheets don't compensate for my lack of eyesight, lack of knowledge of carols (aside from the title / first line)  or lack of singing talent, so for the most part I would be part of an appreciative audience (Rudolph being the most notable exception).

I must confess, I may not have paid full attention to the Hares' pre-run briefing but I do recall there was one route with a potential short cut if anyone didn't fancy the 4.5-5 miles of the full route. We also were given a very generous hint about which way to check it out (Old Moor Lane for the win) and so we headed off along foot paths and houses til we found ourself at Holtspur Lane. 

Now we all know how loud Moose can be, particularly if there is a check ...  or a regroup ... or you can "see 'is 'ouse" (Ed. not to mention a tunnel!), but I'm not sure any of us realised he was loud enough to set off a burglar alarm! Anyway, at this point the obvious way to head (for a Hasher) was across the road and along the beautifully muddy footpath, and sure enough that's the way we headed. Well most of us anyway, until one of our Hares  called us back  (muttering under her breath about not knowing who was setting the hash  and what their preferred terrain was). Hmm .. must be on to the Christmas Tree on Wooburn Green then. And indeed that is where we went although somewhat more circuitously than I expected, deviating, as we did, through more residential areas.

Once on the Green we duly rocked around the Christmas Tree and did some caroling (didn't notice much hopping though). This was the location of my main contribution to the singing, and also, as it happens, to the location of a not wholly desired intervention from Percy and a ... ummm ... 'creative' reimagining of quite what 'Rudolph' could do with his nose that night (thank you Nichola!) As it happened, this was where there was the putative long short split, although (as far as I'm aware there were no shorts, so) it's a moot point.

So on we went to SpadeOak, where we, despite the debate between Hawkeye and Hare about whether a path was a dead end or not, inevitably went up that hill. I think by the time we were two thirds the way up, there was no one even pretending to run it.  Once we got to the top there was only one way to go ... down! With a few diversions on the way (Kissing Gates? Or are they now elbow bump gates, James? Hmmm, I think he deserves a Hashname by now!) and a Triumph in a Tree (no idea if it had an MOT??) we ended up at the Green Dragon, where Hawkeye assured us he knew we would always end up!

From there it was very gentle down hill coast, with ample opportunity to see our GM's (first) 'ouse before we found the On Inn and back to the Falcon, which was as hospitable as ever. Thank you to our Hares, Lawrence and Rachel B and Choir Mistress Mia.

 

=-=-=-=-=-=-= C H R I S T M A S   C R A C K E R S =-=-=-=-=-=-=

 

What do Polar Bears ride?

i-cycles

 

Who is Santa's favourite singer?

Elvish Presley

 

What do reindeer decorate their Christmas trees with?

Horn-aments

 

I hear MI5 are staking out a bakery.  Apparently it's full of mince spies!

 

What did Adam say the day before Christmas?

It's Christmas, Eve!

 

What do you call a bunch of chess players bragging about their games in a hotel lobby?

Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer

 

Plus a bonus for Moose (or should that be Reindeer?):

 

What's green, covered in tinsel and goes ribbet?

Mistle-toad.