Hashes

1358

Date : 26/07/16
Hare : Moose
Scribe : IGSH
Venue : The Bounty
Hounds : 50     Dogs : 0
Recorded distance : 8.53 km
Recorded time : 125.68 min
Uphillness : 289.67 ft

There was joy in the Hash as we arrived at Bourne End station car park, expecting to have to splash out cash on parking, only to find that the ticket machine was broken and no fee could be paid. It seemed like a good omen.
The next good omen was, unlike a standard hash, I actually set out in the right direction for a change. This didn't last long as I, and around half of the hash, went wrong at the very first check and had to be called back by the hare. It was a foretaste of things to come.

Crossing the road we ran the entire length of Furlong Road, so named because it is 2.33 furlongs long. Turning left into Cores End Road, despite being called that way, turned out to be yet another mistake followed by half the hash - so we were again summoned back and sent in an entirely different direction – only to end up, ten minutes later, exactly where we had been before we were called back. Still it was a nice warm evening and nobody seemed to mind very much.

A somewhat complicated route through the housing and it was noticed that the hare was no longer with us – nor was the flour. The two may have been related. Eventually we found our way back to the main road and across into Abbotsbrook (the site of the Nunnery of Little Marlow from the 1230's until Henry VIII was disillusioned by them, if you are interested there is an article about them written by our very own Rose on http://www.archaeologyinmarlow.org.uk/2011/01/the-nuns-of-little-marlow/).

Question: What do you call dangerous precipitation?
Answer: A rain of terror.

Anyway, Helen and Andy soon disappeared off together and weren't seen again for quite a while when they both appeared happy, smiling and together running the wrong way across the railway bridge. With the Bounty just a hundred yards to the west it was obvious that we were in for a trip east down to Cookham. So we checked down towards Cookham and were called back – eventually running past the very front of the Bounty – our designated finishing point for the evening! (a very sneaky trick by the hare!).

A footpath took us across Cock Marsh towards the ominous heights of Winter Hill amid much grumbling that the Hashers didn't really want to run up it (with the notable exception of Hells Bells who checked up it in the hope we were going that way – we really must do something about her. Absolutely unrelated aside: the next meeting of the Hash knee-capping is due soon). Instead, a left along the bottom of the escarpment took us back down towards Cookham again. A couple more left turns took us to the river, past the walkers and on to the on-inn. It also took us past Mark who looked as if he had decided to end it all by throwing himself in the river. However, remembering that he could swim he entertained the fishes and onlookers for a while before crawling back to shore. Finishing swimming is classed as an ex-stream sport.

Back in the car park the few of us who bothered to change met Roger who had set of back to try and find Mike who was missing and presumed lost. Apparently he had spent some considerable time on this quest, including checking all of the local cafés and service stations, only to be told Mike was wandering on his own gazing at the swans just past the pub where Roger had first thought Mike was missing.

Back in the pub the chips were abundant, as was the GM's speech. Aud was presented with a war-like "Shock and Aud" T shirt commemorating here foolishness in running away from 700 pubs, and her far more sensible returning to them 700 times. Another great Bounty hash!