Chip Advisor

The Red Lion


Chip advice dated: 4 August 2015 - Hash #no 1305

Up down pub ranking

Lion by Hook Norton at £3.70 a pint was judged ‘very good….hmmm…..very good indeed’ by Barney, who then proceeded to recount how he used to come into this pub to the ‘Recovery Room’ whenever he’d had his hair cut (think he was a 5 times a week man). However, the alternative Tribute fared less well, and the lagers verged on the poncy with Witburger an eye-watering £4.40…mind you, still 60p cheaper than Mark’s Canadian Duck bitter from the Marlow Donkey a couple of months back, which he’s never stopped going on about since.
Not beer:
80p - wow! However, there were some issues about the ‘limeyness’ on the 1st v 2nd pints (it being 80p, some hashers were splashing the cash and ordering refills), with the marked degree of difference in quality either because of thirst being slaked or the barmaid’s hand being less steady….or both.
Cupcakes, flapjacks charmingly served by the young hashers, and chips less charmingly served by the barman, but still rather good in what looked suspiciously like dog drinking bowls. Still, we licked them clean anyway
1st impressions not great - a large Tudor-style hotel stuck out on the Thame Rd, with a surprising lack of nearby parking. However, in an inverse Tardis paradox (smaller on the inside than it looked on the outside), it was reasonably pleasant once ensconsed, with a long bar, and some memorabilia on the walls giving it a modicum of atmosphere. Luckily Roger’s Tosca awards made plenty of room by scaring off any non-hashers, although the remaining ‘normal’ punters seemed to quite enjoy reading the ‘Hash Trash’ much to Gerry’s delight.


Hummery: Described as a ‘low-key pub with rooms’ on Google, things didn’t look too great judging from the large-frontage exterior, but once inside it was cosy, friendly, and most importantly quite cheap.

Overheard on the hash (4th Aug 2015)

“There’s a good reason why it’s not called Shortwick or Mediumwick….although, f*cking Longwick might be more appropriate at this point in time!”[The hash grumblings begin after 7 miles]

“Nah, this hash isn’t all it’s cracked up to be” “Rather styl-ish though eh?”  [Matt & Dr Dan compete for the worst pun whilst running across fault lines and over innumerable obstacles]

“It’s flat, quite long, and Jo, there are no cows” “What are those cows doing over there….why is Alan holding the gate…..BLOODY HELL, there are cows in that field” “Well they weren’t there before….a neither was the bull.” “The BULL ?!!!!” [Nikki’s hash briefing unravels at a rate of knots]

“That was a 4-back…oh hang on, it was a Ford-Back” [a few seconds later]“Oh, that’s got me all wet” [Helen enjoys herself a little too much in the absence of Aaron]

Maybe we should name people after what they’re carrying….ah, on 2nd thoughts, that might not work so well [Jess referring to Matt carrying a big stick…running next to Alex carrying a steaming bag of dog poo]

Oh no, we’ll say something which Matt will write up in the Hashalator [Not unless it was interesting, insidious, or incriminating Tash…which it wasn’t. But give me a minute and I’ll make something up!]



No. Date Hare Details
130504/08/15Gritty-Arsed Fox & BFG