Chip Advisor

The Hit or Miss

Penn Street

Chip advice dated: 21 February 2017 - Hash #no 1390

Up down pub ranking

[Mick] Two decent Badger ales - Leaping Legend and First Call. Also King & Barnes Sussex, "nearly beer" at 3.6%. The hoppy Legend and smooth First Call were rather spoiled by the extraction of £4.25 a pint however and the landlord didn't even wear a mask or striped top! [Matt] To paraphrase Roy Schneider's police captain in Jaws....'We're gonna need a bigger wallet!'. To be fair this pub does stock 'interesting' beers, with the ales transported from 'not round 'ese parts'. The fact they seem to have been transported in a taxi should be neither here nor there.
Not beer:
[Mick] Whilst the soda was FREE (it's awful so it bloomin should be) and the addition of lime only cost a reasonable 50p, the glum faces of the brown fizzy stuff drinkers betrayed a pretty steep asking price of £3.60 Poor old Keyboard looked like he was going to take his home and put it on display rather than drink it. [Matt] Jo was most pleased with her new ruse of 'just soda', so if you see her carrying around a little pale green or yellow sample jar with her at the next hash, please do feel free to stop and ask for a taste. Unless she's just been to the Outpatients which case I'd spit it out pretty damned sharp-ish if I were you!
[Mick] Simply scrumptious! Plenty of exceedingly tasty offerings with decent sized bowls of ketchup and mayo in support. Sitting opposite Muncher Mike was like being beaten again and again by a fast draw expert as his chip to gob action speeded into a blur. [Matt] "If he brings another bowl, it's a 10 from me", said Aaron. Unfortunately he didn't, so it was a highly commended '9'...and definitely an early runner (or walker, we're all inclusive at HWH3) for 'Chips of the Year'.
[Mick] A welcoming, up market hostelry with good service, decent decor and plenty of seating for HWH3. All in all a pleasant experience apart from the aforementioned pain over the beer/coke cashectomy. [Matt] Any pub that doesn't blink an eye when Roger goes around dispensing pigs ears like confetti from a plastic bag (to the hash hounds....although Mike was looking decidedly interested at the prospect of free food) must have a certain laid-back style. Mark & I mused on this as we poked the fire together (not a euphemism I hasten to add!) and chatted with the landlord afterwards, who explained that this was run as the 'Restaurant Pub', whilst 100m down the road, his son ran the Squirrel as the 'Village Pub'.....which I guess explains the higher beer prices, excellent chips, and the tolerance of pigs' ears in the bar area....or perhaps they thought they were upmarket pork scratchings?


"Oh Tarquin, Chelsee told me that Rodney said that the ale was a touch pricey at the H or M". " Don't drink the filthy stuff old gal. Large Pinkers is my tipple don't you know, and anyhow I'll take the Titanium card along. Now hurry along and get the Bentley out". Well, in up market Penn Street, our venture to the Hit or Miss, dating back to the eighteenth century and formerly part of a furniture factory, was never going to set any records for VFM was it?


Overheard on the hash (22nd Feb)

“OK, so Kevin is sunning himself in Lanzarote and Matt’s done the write-up for the past two hashes….who wants to volunteer for this one?” Roger puts out a public information announcement “Well, Rob never did his write-up after his last hash” Andy cheerfully ‘outs’ Rob in front of the hash “Grrrr……” Rob is less appreciative of Andy’s ‘help’!

“We laid this on Sunday, so I don’t know how much flour there will be left after the dogs, slugs, and muntjac deer have been at it” Maggie gets her excuses in early. “Would these be Spanish flour-eating slugs, or a particularly voracious new English variety” The Hash questions…… “Shut up. On on right!” Maggie answers…..

“My chest was so bad, it sounded like 2 chainsaws going at it….by which I mean, making love” Ade. “Well, that’s certainly an image I’ll remember for a while” Helen “Not exactly a standard Mills & Boon opening though is it Ade…did you compose that especially for Valentine’s Day?” Matt “Well, you should have seen the bed afterwards…!” Ade warms to his theme “ I guess that would be without any foreplay….just think if those 2 chainsaws really got it on, the headboard would be broken into tiny splinters and the bed would be in pieces” ..and Matt warms to his….

“3 marathons, back to back, in 5 weeks. The training starts here. What could possibly go wrong? 20m later….
“Bugger this, I’m walking up this hill” Mark’s training plan appears on track…roughly

”So what happened in Penn last night?” Roger questions… “ Nothing much Roger….bunch of people ran through muddy woods?” Phil, Mark and Matt “You mean nobody set themselves on fire….like in Sweden…according to Trump?” “Oh, you mean that hot topic….?!” …about 50 fire-related puns later, Phil and Mark finally run out of steam (no pun intended!)


No. Date Hare Details
139021/02/17Rocky Road & Dave
123225/03/14General Menace
Hit or miss - GM's 60th