They say that London buses always come in threes.
Well, not in Great Hampden, and for self evident reasons. The residents have surrounded themselves with an economic moat, comprising pot-holed roads and gnarly root infested mud baths, that kept the Normans at bay and will certainly keep Brexit induced hysteria away. But not Hashers, it seems, who arrived in their droves (sorry, cars).
The field gates were open to create additional parking, and, as has been seen during previous visits, it was a case of “park in haste, leave at your leisure (as you await your turn to be pushed).
Why the interest, you ask?
If you want someone to blame, blame Scribbler, and his new-fangled transferable voting system. As a valued member of HWH3, you vote for your favourite pub of 2018, then 2nd thru’ to 6th. These votes are collated by our Sooper Electoral Commission in his electronic black box, and despatched by courier (a wire) to Scribbler. He makes a cup of tea, looks at the tea leaves, discards the black box, draws a pie chart and announces the winner. As electoral systems go, it is remarkably effective.
Which is how we came to be at the Hampden Arms on a windy, but rain-free, night.
Matt got his apologies in early:
- Sorry, my dad set the short run.
- Sorry, I set the long run.
- Sorry, I forgot to bring the PotY certificate.
- Sorry, its too cold for my camera, so we will take a photo later.
- Sorry, it’s that way.
Off we trot towards Prestwood, but not for long.
Longs disappeared left towards the Great Hampden Estate. Where they went is anyone’s guess as the hash mapulator is blank.
Maps exchanged hands, and we shorts shot off to the right (I use the term “shot” loosely, to mean anything faster than stationary).
Fortunately, we had Sarah with us who was not only our SRB, but was also the official checker as well. Two checks flashed by, and we were still on the trail. Nice and flat, as predicted.
Then, the map committee convened. It was all downhill from there, even though the ground was still perfectly flat.--colbreak--
Hampden Common hove into view. Damn cunning of Steve, I remember thinking, to put the flour on the far side of the trees. Makes it harder to see from a distance, y’see.
Then we reached Denner Farm, where the map committee convened again, and decided we were going out, on the in-bound track. We could have retraced out steps, and re-found the correct route, but, hey, what’s the point of going short if you end up going long.
So, quite guilt free, we skirted Great Hampden Farm and meandered up Memorial Road, arriving back at the pub at 8:45pm. That was quite a result (3.5km).
Half an hour later, the longs appeared, happy as sand flies.
Then, it was time for the business of the day, the group photograph followed by the award ceremony. Mein host, Louise, was only too happy to play along. In the company of the insane, it is best not to stand out.
Not one to miss out on saying many words when a few would suffice, I read a prepared speech. Fortunately, I had had access to the hashalator, which said all that needed to be said. I plagiarised its report, which had Scribblers DNA splattered all over it, so it was well received by all who heard it. Louise (mein host) even had a tear in her eye. That went when I stopped speaking (coincidence?) and handed over the virtual certificate, which she virtually pinned on the wall. Then, the chips flowed, and there was consensus in the land.
Thanks Scribbler (and Paw), for making it virtually happen.
Some Brexit jokes (to go with along the real thing).
“An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. The Englishman wanted to go so they all had to leave.”
“How about that Brexit, huh? I’ve haven’t seen so many Brits pull out since Madonna was dating.”
“Q: With Britain leaving the EU how much space was created? A: Exactly 1GB”
“‘In and out’, it’s a very hard decision. It’s like the other day, my flatmate was making me a peppermint tea, and he said ‘would you like the bag leaving in, or taken out?’ If you leave the bag in, on the whole the cup of tea itself will get stronger, and it might appear that the bag is getting weaker, but it’s now part of a stronger cup of tea. Whereas if you take the bag out, the tea’s now quite weak, but the bag itself goes directly in the bin.”