To say it was cold would be like saying that Dolly Parton sleeps on her back… stating the obvious! But still we gathered at the Marlow Donkey dressed in an array of yellow, fluorescent attire; bibs, hats, coats, gloves, leggings, shorts… we looked like we came from Chenoble, still glowing from the fallout, and brains mushed up enough to bring ourselves out running on such a cold, foggy and slippery night when we should be tucked up on the sofa writing Christmas cards with It's a Wonderful Life on in the background.
No virgins tonight, but lovely to see Kerry back (some might think she just turned up to make sure she got an invite to the Hash Bash, but we’re not that cynical!).
So……Sooper Cooper gave the orders and told us that it was a very civilised and fairly short hash! Short maybe, but civilised? Hashers? Nah!!!
The on-on right out the pub took us towards the train station, through a business park and then, er…... At this point, it has dawned on us that we didn’t pick up the lovely, colourful and detailed map that the hare caringly printed out for us so we could write an accurate report. So, in usual hash form we'll have to make it up!
Fairly early on we encountered several very slippery bridges. Thanks to the GM's warning we were all careful to "WALK, DON'T RUN" (H - which made me strangely reminiscent of my school days!), which made a welcome change to "OPEN YOUR LEGS". Down to the river path and was surprised to find the shiggy had yet to succumb to the -40o temperatures and was still wet and squelchy! Gwen nearly found this out the hard way but after slipping and appearing to actually walk on water, before she righted herself and carrying on.
It was very eerie and misty down by the river, the boat-houses and mansions looking haunting in the fog. It was along the straight, single-track path that runs alongside the river that some of us managed to get lost! Realising that there hadn't been any flour for some distance, we dawdled for about 10 minutes randomly shouting "are you?" or "are we?" or "help" to see if we got any response from those far behind us, which must have included the hare. We ran on only to we found several more keen bods under a bridge, enjoying the amazing and scientific phenomenon commonly known as an echo! So, being decisive (after 15 minutes of faffing) we trotted on regardless of whether we were on the right trail or not (it was not), only to come across the hare and his faithful and sensible followers running towards us! There were several comments from the lost hashers along the lines of 'what a c0ck up' and 'bit of a balls up', but we maintain that we deliberately got lost to prove the theory that hashers have a 6th sense and will always find their way back to the hare/pub when needed.
As we came back towards Marlow town centre the hare told us there was an optional view stop but that it was off the beaten trail. In true hasher form there wasn’t much take up as this meant coming back on yourself which meant running further than absolutely needed to get to the pub.
H - Dick, Matt and I can vouch that it was a very pretty view of the weir and it was worth dicing with death on the icy bridge to view it J.
J - I actually thought they were trying to get a look at Ade's house from there, but I’ve seen that before so decided to run on.
The trail took us through Marlow graveyard and across the High Street and back down to the river, where the swans looked mildly peeved at having their peaceful evening disturbed by a loud runners and conversations of The Queen eating roast swan and mash every Sunday, the Queen being the only person allowed to eat swans, apparently, as she owns them all.
The final stages took us back over the High Street and on the roads back to the pub. Only at this point did Ade, Gerry and Sam re-join the hash from somewhere. Of course we had realised they were missing and had been terribly concerned, but no one wanted to say anything that would cause worry. Luckily they re-joined us before we got to the pub and raised the alarm. Close one!
The hare was right, it was a civilised hash, no hills, not too much mud and some picturesque scenery. Thanks Sooper, and thanks for the lovely chips! :o)