The Falcon

Overheard on the hash (25th August 2015)

“Summer…..Suuummmmerrrr!” [The Crawshaws] “It’s OK, she’s here by the gate”  [Kev]“That’s not Summer, that’s a labrador and it’s not even from the hash” “Well, it had 4 paws and a tail, how was I to know?” [The Crawshaws (a new Kardashian-lite reality family) have a set-to with Kev about their dog]

“Oh, Kev, you got me all wet!” [Helen] “Well, so would I if I had feet the size of snowshoes and ran through a puddle next to you” [Matt]

“I nearly didn’t make it up that slope, having avoided the steps” “Yup, I was waiting for a re-enactment of Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom” “Really, you think I’d be Indiana Jones” “No - you’d be the boulder” [Andy’s hopes of movie stardom are instantly dashed, crushed, and ground into pieces]

“Be careful guys - the ’S!’ means slippery bridge”  [Ant]  “Where’s the flour gone?” [Andy, Alex, Matt] “Oh, that’s the wrong way”  [Ant]”Well why did you warn us about the slippery bridge and mark it if it was the wrong way?” “Because you might have slipped” [Any wears all & sundry down with his logic]

“Helen, you are currently the meat in a rather large sandwich - you’d better hope nobody stops suddenly. I think they call it ‘super-dense crush load’ on the Indian railways” [Helen takes her life in her hands and runs in a narrow alleyway in-between Kev, Andy & Matt]

”Roger, can we have the ‘Short’ speech please?” [the collective plea goes out in the pub]